A friend comes over for a play date and my house looks like a tornado struck my kitchen. Muffin crumbs are strung within a 10 foot radius of our table, juice (or possibly urine) is puddled under the table. Crafts from the night before are still glued to the table and 10 markers are missing their caps. But that friend walks in for our play date and doesn’t mention the mess, but swoops in and hugs my kids and zaps her cold cup of coffee in the microwave for the 4th time of the day.

That’s mom code.

No one mentions the mess, we’re just living life together in survival mode.

Walking into Target on the rare occasion that I am sans kids, and I see a mom in the dollar spot with one screaming baby in the cart, pouring out snacks from a bag she most likely opened from the shelves in the store, and the other kids hanging backwards off the front of the cart. Another kids makes a bee line for the front door and the mom scrambles to make the quick decision to abandon her cart full of kids or dart after the runaway. I jump into mom mode and grab the strange kid and block the doorway. Her thankful expression says it all. She is exhausted, embarrassed and thankful to have found another mom on the same journey. Our eyes meet and we both know we both get it.

That’s mom code.

No one mentions that chaos, we just dive in to help a fellow mom.

A mom is in the newborn haze, covered in milk (both spit up and from her breasts). Her hair is in a ball on top of her head, and her eyes are glazed over from lack of sleep and a screaming baby. Two moms show up with cleaning supplies, a hot meal, and a sound machine (for mom, not the baby). The two friends jump into action, one cleaning the kitchen and the other picking up the playroom. No one asked for help, but it is always welcomed with open arms.

That’s mom code.

No one has to ask, because likely no one ever will.

Mom code is doing for each other because we’ve all been there. We know the exhaustion and hormones can turn a mom into a mess. No one got through this mom journey alone. It really does take a village and a huge understanding of the Mom code.

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